My apologies.

My blog fans have been complaining...mainly dad, who was hanging out in the Alps buying more watches, tanning, and trying to read my blog.

These are only the ones I could find in 10 minutes.

(Mom didn't look quite as stunning these last few days.)

Before dad left a few days ago, I decided to be nice and let them eat in peace at the restaurant on the corner. I slept for two hours while they dined on club sandwiches, cesear salad and lava cake. 

Well, mom should have known better...

After dad left for Switzerland, mom got very sick (we planned it perfectly). Not only did she not eat anything for two whole days, she had a splitting headache (thanks to the weather), which actually played in my favor. Unless I was eating sparklers (which I did actually try to do) mom let me pretty much have full run of the apartment. 

Things I did while she was sick:

Ate dirt from the potted plant. Delicious, by the way! 

Unpacked ALL socks, underwear, towels and diapers. 

Peed on the floor. 

Ate cardboard and carpet. Together. 

Permanently disabled the TV. 

Tried to swallow fireworks. Mom yelled at me for the one! I finally got her up from the floor. 

Crawled off the bed, face first on to the floor. No major injures to report, other than to mom's psyche. 

And hid pieces of cheese for mom to find three days later under the couch. 

All in all, I had a fabulous three days! Dad returned, and things are back to normal. He's off to get me coffee and donuts. 

Life. Is. Good.